what is your relationship with God like?

Someone asked me to answer this question recenly. It's hard to write down the truth when there's a war going on in my heart.

God is always faithful and always forgiving. I love the Lord. I go through spurts of really living out this love and being aware of His presence. Sporadically, I’m able to pray without even trying and my heart is on fire. Other times I feel detached and distance from God and it’s really hard to pray- and I tend to feel numb and just look for distractions to make me feel better. But what feels like my most basic instinct or need is to worship Him.

That’s when I feel most alive.

The thing I care about most in life is living for God and living out His will for my life. I often struggle with understanding what that could look like.